Comic Book Moments of the Week for 05/07/08

There weren't as many moments as I thought there would be this week, but I somehow managed to find a nice collection for you guys. House of Mystery is now on my "most f'd up" list after coming across a scene from its debut issue. I didn't even want to post the images here, as I don't have a spoiler option to hide it from people, so just put links from imageshack for those curious, and brave, enough to view it. Some things, once seen, cannot be unseen. Enjoy the moments and check back tomorrow for some Iron Man movie review action.

ACTION COMICS ANNUAL #11

"And. They're. All. CRIMINALS."

This was one of my favourite scenes in the book, mainly because of the dialogue, as the art was basically a series of cut and paste affairs with the odd change in expression. I actually kind of agree with Lex's line of reasoning here. Of course, dedicating your life to killing Superman seems counterproductive compared to just curing cancer or famine and reaping the rewards and accolades from that and proving human superiority that way, but, hey, it's a hobby.

"I am Lex Luthor."

Yet another great scene with Lex Luthor in this week's Annual. I'm a little unimpressed with the jobbing out of a Superman level goon in such a quick manner, but the whole issue was ripe with that kind of stuff. At least this was done by Lex instead of some D-listers.

"It was ME!"

Man, Superman is a dick. Lex put together all the weaponry, which even Supes used, assembled the Revenge Squad, helped take down everybody while Superman chatted with Zod and even put his ass on the line to infiltrate the fortress and jury rigged the pod to suck everyone back into the Negative Zone and Superman gives all the credit to the kid while Lex goes to jail? Now, I know how Lex has felt all these years. Even I want to kill him after reading this.

HOUSE OF MYSTERY #1

Click Here For the Most Disturbing Thing I've Seen In A Long Time

I'm serious, the above link is not for the faint of heart and I'm not talking something like The Walking Dead, where a baby and mother were shot, or the Punisher MAX moments, where it looked like Baracuda shot a baby in the face. This is like something from the most disturbing corners of the Japanese hentai world.

INVINCIBILE IRON MAN #1

"Shut up, you're fired. Can I fire you?"

Good to see Tony and Jim carrying on like this again. Jim is surprisingly missing from the Knauf's work and it was nice seeing Fraction bring him into this book, if only in cameo form.

NOVA #13

"How does the Surfer's board make a "SHOOOMMM" sound in space?"

That's a badass looking Galactus. Rare to see a slightly modified version of him in the comics, but I loved the addition of the stars and planets in his torso. Could just be something to do with eating a planet, but made for a great image, nonetheless. The last page with the Silver Surfer grabbing Nova made for an evil cliffhanger, in that it will be another 30 days before we get to see the next issue.

SECRET INVASION #2

"A dinosaur? In the Savage Land? That's new."

After a couple pages of rather generic fight scenes, where we don't really see anything except grappling, the whole thing was wrapped up with a dinosaur barging in on them and ending the fight? Half the people present could have simply hit it with their pinky and stopped it. How did it manage to end a fight between 30 or so of the Earth's so-called Mightiest Heroes? Clearly, the only solution to the Skrull problem is to have Deadpool bring a large contingent of dinosaurs from the Savage Land back to New York, alla the last issue of his series.

"Wallpaper'd."

What an awesome final splashpage to this issue. It almost made the issue worthwhile. Almost. I'm a little confused at who would honestly want Doc Ock's tentacles when they could just make him another Thor Skrull, but I guess there's a limited supply of hammer's and that guy got stuck out in the cold in the powers department. My favourite is the Mr Fantastic Strange Bolt Man, who seems to have Reed's stretching, Dr Strange's cape, Black Bolt's antenae and Iron Man's gauntlet.

Anyone have any idea who the guy in the lower right corner is supposed to be? All I can think of is Sabertooth for the claws, but can't place anything else.

X-FACTOR: THE QUICK AND THE DEAD #1

"This here is just messed up."

Quicksilver is going a little stir crazy here. I know I'd be freaking if I was in a cell with someone like that.

"I can fly! Oh wait, no I can't."

I'm not sure if his powers cut out or if he's just not Flash enough to spin his arm's fast enough to fly, but watching him bounce of the plane and hit the ocean makes me wonder where he got the super strength / durability to survive that.

YOUNG X-MEN #2

"I hate you Cyclops."

There were some mutant detector thingy's given to the members in the comic shortly after this and Santo's said there were only 5 mutants present for the 6 of them, counting Cyclops. I'm praying that it's not broken and Cyke is a fake. It's possible Ink is the false one, though, seeing as he betrayed them at the end of the issue. He seems to know too much to not be Cyclops at this point, but it just doesn't make sense if it is him. Even if it turns out to be a fake, it won't fix bad writing and this series won't get any better because of it.

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Comic Book Moments of the Week for 04/30/08

Better late then never, the Moments of the last Week are here to satisfy your comic book moment cravings! The reason I didn't post this, or anything, earlier is because I was away all weekend and didn't get a chance to track down any scans or even use the computer.

I hear some obscure new movie did well this weekend. Iron something or other. I didn't get a chance to go see it, but I will be going next weekend for my birthday, so I expect good times based on all the positive word of mouth for it. I'll probably post some of my impressions for it after I've had a chance to see it.

You guys have waited long enough, so I'll let you get on to the moments. Enjoy.

AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE #12

"Great. We better stock up on more jars."

I would have posted more Initiative moments, but the art is just so bad, I think it probably hurts some of the moments. However, despite Taskmaster's, um, I think that's his face, this scene was too funny to pass up. Although, Tasky and Ant-Man are the last two guys I'd send to deliver the bad news to anyone.

"This isn't fun for her, it's her job."

Wow, this was the best image of the issue for me. If you've been following along since the beginning when War Machine first recruited Cloud 9 as she gleefully flew through the air on her cloud and compare it to now, the change is like night and day and this scene drives home what's wrong with the Initiative as a concept (not the book, the actual registration initiative in the Marvel U).

Iron Man admits he's left Camp Hammond and the actual running of the Initiative to other people and it's gone out of control, so maybe, with Gyrich ousted, the next batch of recruits won't go through the same meat grinder.

Also, all the graduates have terrible super hero costumes. Cloud 9's original appearance with the snow border / skateborder like attire was much better than this...thing she's wearing. Same for most of the other recruits.

BLUE BEETLE #26

"Uh, did they just return from space or something?"

Can anyone explain how, while flying to the family picnic, Jaime somehow managed to get turned upside down? Is that a normal flying technique? To be honest, nothing about the image makes sense. Traci's hair should be hanging down (er, up?) in the image towards the ground.

"You rock, grandma!"

Jaime's grandmother is awesome and I hope we see more of her. I'd have posted the random conversations and other fun stuff from the issue, but it was in Spanish and I don't think the majority of the readers would be able to understand what's going on outside of Jaime getting smacked in the head multiple times. Anyways, grandma asks Jaime to take her flying to remind her of having the air blowing through her hair like when her husband used to take her horseback riding.

COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #0 DC UNIVERSE #0

"Do I hear a hallelujah!"

Who, in their right mind, would follow this guy? Libra is stark raving mad and I love all the villains' faces. They seem to mirror my thoughts. I can't see how this guy is going to be a major player or get anyone to join his cause based on this appearance, but stranger things are happening. Just refer to Countdown for examples.

"This! Is! DC's idea of a joke?"

300 is so 2007. It's time to move on DC. Did we not learn our lesson with Amazons Attack? Did we really need a Manazons storyline? They could have at least tried to make them look a little less like the Spartans in the movie. I guess the white towel in the front is new.

DAREDEVIL - BLOOD OF THE TARANTULA

"Yes, that's his hand being cut off with a pocket knife."

Man, Black Tarantula doesn't like having his family threatened or being lured into traps with imposter versions of them or even little things like being blown up and lit on fire. His cousin, seen being dismembered here, is learning that the hard way. Daredevil actually walks out of the building on the next page and gives Black Tarantula the okay for doing this and let's him off the hook, no questions asked, after seeing this. That was the only thing I didn't like about this issue, to be honest.

GREEN LANTER #30

"Teapot, meet kettle."

Didn't Hal used to call him Pieface back in the old issues, like way back when it was "okay" to be racist? I could have sworn he did. Anyways, even if he didn't, Hal sticks up for his buddy having some racist comments thrown his way by...making racist comments towards the other guy. Brilliant. Remember, Asians are okay in Hal's book, but your a retard if you're Pollick.

IMMORTAL IRON FIST #14

"Nova, you're fired. We have a new human rocket."

Poor Nova can't catch a break. Just when he has an awesome new solo title and annihilating stuff left and right, Iron Fist has to come along and steal his schtick. I couldn't find the build up page, but it explains his chi aligning and other mystic stuff for his newfound rocketman powers. It was awesome and this was only the first three or four pages.

"We will blind one of you. We will kill two of you. And three of you will never have children. Ever."

It was great to see Brubaker and Fraction spare a few pages on the Heroes 4 Hire crew and give them some great moments like this one here. Makes me want to see the two of them write a H4H book in the future.

"Bastard's Black Heartcrusher..."

...is my favourite technique of the bunch. Marvel needs to get Capcom on a Marvel VS Capcom style Iron Fist 2D fighter starring the Immortal Weapons, stat. That thing would do gangbusters. Well, I'd enjoy it, at least. Aside from the technique names, this is just a badass half page splash (I cropped the other half).

"Now, who's up for registering?"

I want to see Iron Man just try and get these guys to register. Yes, Danny got off on a registered weapon martial arts thing, but that was before he blew up trains. Add in a woman with a body or hole in her chest full of spiders or a guy that turns into green mist and owns everything he touches and I think he'll have trouble getting off on that technicality.

Joking aside, how can Bru and Fraction leave us after teasing about an 8th city and bringing these seven badasses back to New York with Danny? It's like a pulp Seven Samurai on crack now. I can just see Fat Cobra being arrested after picking up a dozen hookers and everyone at Danny's place complaining about spiders all over the food and stuff. It'd be like the best sitcom ever.

"What's with that bottom left panel and the gore?"

This is an amazing page and I love the breakdowns and layout, but what's up with that bottom left panel? That was a signature special effect they used in this book a lot in earlier issues, but this is literally the only time it shows up in this issue, despite the numerous broken bones and bloodied Hydra goons. Even now, it sticks out like a sore thumb to me everytime I see it.

Another odd thing about this moment is the amount of bloodshed compared to every other page in the book. One guy is getting his head blown off while others are impaled and this one splash page is the only time this level of gore is shown. I'm not complaining, but just pointing out something that stood out to me.

NEW AVENGERS #40

"Turn the Queen into a sleeper agent and send her to Earth. Great plan!"

I guess it would be safer than the amount of crap the Skrulls have gone through, what with Galactus and Annihilus messing up their shit, but, seriously, who sends their Queen on suicide missions? No wonder these guys fail all the time.

I was a bit upset with the non-answers for the undetectability of the Skrulls, as it boils down to a Quesada-esque, "It's SCIENCE, we don't have to explain it!", where science replaces his magic quote in relation to Mephisto in One More Day. However, the Spider-Woman reveal was interesting, as I had written her off compeletly as a Skrull suspect, especially after Nick Fury's spotlight in Mighty Avengers last week.

THOR - AGES OF THUNDER #1

"Owned."

Yeah, this one of the more tamer, if you can call it that, Thor moments from this week's Thor - Ages of Thunder issue. A magic hammer through the brainpan usually stops Frost Giants. At least, that's what mamma used to tell me.

"Pimpin' ain't easy!"

Man, Thor was such a man whore back in the old days. Are there any other women left in Asgard or does Thor have a monopoly on them?

TEEN TITANS #58

"Puppy Power!"

Wow, this was hilarious. Apparently, Martian Girl 'fought' back with her future self, who is imprisoned in her head, by thinking up a bunch of slobbering puppies to lick her to death.

"Robin is such a dick."

Wow, forging documents is a crime? Who knew, Boy Wonder? The Batcave must have a freaking vending machine for this crap, what with Batman's numerous jaunts through the criminal underworld in disguise or his trips to foreign countries. Hell, Superman and his entire clan are aliens, yet magically have fake identities and all these magic documents that came from no where. Even the other Martian on Earth, J'onn, has (or had, I don't know if still uses it, don't care either) a secret identity and forged documents. They just set up Raven, who's back from the dead and de-aged, with a new life to go back to school with.

Coming from a guy that tried to illegally clone Superboy, an illegal clone as it is, I think Robin should get off his high horse. To paraphrase the goddamned Batman, is he dense? Is he retarded or something?

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Comic Book Moments of the Week for 04/23/08

We may as well just call this the Ultimate Spider-Man Moments of the Week based on the huge number of moments I've got from that book this week. I'll let you all get straight to the moments, so hit the jump and all that jazz.

BIRDS OF PREY #117

"Dark Vengence!"

Misfit is a pretty funny character. I especially liked her kicking ass and taking names in this panel. I should probably read more Birds of Prey, especially with Manhunter showing up in it now (look for more on Manhunter tomorrow)

COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #1

"It's a shop. I can tell by the pixels and having seen a few shops in my day."

Yes, this is not the actual panel that was in the comic, but I think it's pretty appropriate considering the whole "I'm Mary damn Marvel!" that she said in the actual comic. I would have changed it to "I'm the goddamn Mary Marvel!" if I had done this, but it still works with how the unknown person did it here.

MIGHTY AVENGERS #12

"Time has ravaged your once youthful appearance, Countess."

Here's another little bit of jump in logic alla Iron Man / New Avengers by Nick Fury. He sees one dead Skrull and a week later he's found out about a huge planet wide infilitration by an alien race and infilitrates the Helicarrier to tell Maria Hill. All based on killing one Skrull. One. Skrull. Iron Man and the New Avengers made similar assumptions based on very little evidence. It's the one thing I don't get with this event. It's all manufactured hype by Bendis in interviews and through bizarre character assumptions.

"Clearly Fury has it in for the Young Avengers."

Here's the infamous Wall of Nick Fury. He's got doubles of almost all the Young Avengers for some reason. Maybe artist mess up? I think the red ones are confirmed Skrulls by Fury. Hulking is obvious since he's well half Skrull. Wolverine is another obvious one since he was already replaced once by a Skrull in Millar's run on his book. Dr Strange is pretty damn conspicuous based on all my observations from way back when and they've only compounded since then. Sentry makes sense for a highly probably one. Note this takes place before WWH, so Sentry, who came out of nowhere and inserted himself in the Avengers, would be a very suspicous new hero for someone like Fury.

The blue circles are either probably suspects or in the clear for some reason. Spider-Man all of a sudden joins the Avengers after years of loner attitude might tip off Fury or he might have some other reason for circling him. Can't think of anything for Daredevil other than he's base human and easily imitated. Same for Cassie Lang. This is before Civil War, so maybe her becoming a hero all of a sudden or her easy connections to the Avengers make her a likely candidate for impersonating.

MS. MARVEL #26

"Yesss. Just like home."

You'd probably have to have read Nextwave for this to make any sense, but it's damn funny if you did.

THOR #8

"He shall not die today!"

I don't think I have to explain too much here. Odin is stuck in an endless fight to the death and rebirth to do it all over again in this underworld setting and, while it doesn't change anything longterm, Thor joins with his father to take down Surtur, winning a small victory in that his father won't suffer through another death on this day. Usual father/son bonding stuff.

"Beautiful..."

Compare the first Thor moment to this one and tell me there isn't a noticeable dip in quality. Sif and Loki look terrible, especially compared to Loki's appearance last issue. Still, this caught me off guard. I thought Jane was going to be the evil bitch holding onto Sif's essence and not letting her go, but it turns out Loki was behind it all along. Was hoping he/she'd be more subtle this time around, but looks like she's back to her old tricks.

ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #121

"Where's all that responsibility nonsense you talk about now?"

So this is why Joe Q and the Marvel brass don't want Peter to have any kids in the comics. It all makes sense now.

"B-minus!!!"

Kitty is way too happy over this B-minus. I'm not sure if it's over Peter getting screwed on his GPA or if she's just a dunce that gets D's and C's all the time and is ecstatic over getting a B.

"I'm not Spider-Man!"

Little references to past stories, like seen here, are always a nice touch for long time readers and it's been a while since we seen Flash, so it was nice to see him have a funny moment like this.

"Worst. Guidance. Councillor. EVER."

Man, talk about singling out someone in regards to a touchy subject like race. This is like pointing to the one black kid in a white community and asking him about his experiences with it. Kitty's look is priceless, as is the stunned look on the guidance councillor's face as she realizes she's messed up.

"She's in and I'm not??"

Ouch. When you're bumped from the X-Men roster in favour of Liz Allen, you know you've hit rock bottom. It's been a while though, but didn't Kitty leave the X-Men on her own or her mother pulled her out? I don't recall them kicking her out, but I could be wrong.

"Poor Betty."

Wow, Jonah tears Betty a new one here. Most Jonah rants come off as comical as he's talking out his ass and just blowing smoke for the most part, but I just feel sorry for her after this one.

"Uh-huh. It's web in face time."

Don't mess with someone who routinely webs you to chairs or walls. It's just not going to work out in your favour. Jonah definitely knows what's coming in this last panel and the facial expression is perfect.

UNCANNY X-MEN #497

"You wish you'd been a filthy hippy."

Cyclops is pretty carefree considering he sent a bunch of his friends and children off to kill a bunch of people over in X-Force and Young X-Men, but I guess he had time to sort stuff out during his vacation in the Savage Land with Emma. Still, I found Emma's hippy line and Scott's disappointment over her wearing too much clothing pretty funny.

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Comic Book Moments of the Week for 04/16/08 - UPDATED

Seeing as I only picked up two or three DC books this week, it's no surprise the moments are dominated by Marvel. If you happened to pick up any DC, or any other, books that I didn't this week and think there's a moment worth spotlighting, let me know and I'll try to get a scan. I didn't really see much talk on any DC boards, so I'm not sure if anything noteworthy really happened in the handful of books they put out this week. Anyways, enjoy the moments!

UPDATE - Forgot the Captain America, an Avengers Initiative and a X-Men: DWS moments.

ANNIHILATION: CONQUEST #6

"This is the part where Ultron teleports in and hits me."

This is actually the bottom and top of two separate pages, so I think it had a much more dramatic effect in the actual book. Thankfully Mantis wasn't killed here, but she is comatose in the hospital at the end. I'm sure this will be picked up on in the Guardians of the Galaxy series launching soon. I loved this new version of Mantis and hope she isn't out of action for too long.

"We are not pleased!"

This was the highlight of the issue. Warlock's entrance and battle cry were perfect. It was left up in the air, but I wonder what's going to become of Warlock and Tyro post-Conquest. The New Mutants team was recently seen in the Young X-Men. Can a reuninion with Warlock be far behind?

AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE #11

"My legs, Roger, my legs..."

Hardball and Komodo are my pick for couple of the year. Shame he's a backstabbing traitor that stole top secret military secrets and sold them. This scene in particular, though, was quite powerful and made even moreso if you happen to know that Komodo's human form already had her legs amputated and that is the reason she took the Lizard formula and became Komodo in the first place. So, while her Komodo legs will regrow due to the lizard properties, it still hurts like hell and the psychological aspect of it is what makes this scene work in spite of her healing factor.

"Oh, shut up and die already."

Gyrich, you magnificent bastard. I nearly spit my coffee out when I read this panel. Caught me completely off guard when he told him to shut up and die. While Gyrich is a prick, that's kind of the point and I hope he doesn't end up removed from this series after the KIA events become public knowledge.

"War..machine?"

Anyone know what was up with this? Last I remember, he was in ONE and then he was here and I don't recall any Terminator-style changes to War Machine.

"There's not a single word in there I approve of."

Cloud 9 is awesome. Slott did a great job of using her character to "recap" what happened in previous issues and War Machine's reaction caps off a perfect scene.

"Kiss of Death"

This was a very creative use of Cloud 9's powers that nearly took down KIA and weakened him enough for the finishing blow by the original MVP clone.


CAPTAIN AMERIC #37

"Look out for the internet!"

This completely random dream from Bucky ranks up with the "what is myspace" jokes for Cap that were going around after Sally Floyd's little rant in Frontline. I suppose people that were frozen for 60 years would probably have messed up dreams like this as they reconcile the past with the present, but it's still hilarious to me.

"You're not Steve!"

The common theory from commentors and various message boards is that this the imposter Cap from 1950's during an unsuccessful relaunch of the character before his eventual return in Avengers. He became known as the Grand Director and it's a plausible guess based on everything Brubaker has ruled out in interviews.

COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #2

"He's freaking Darkseid!"

Words "freaking" fail me.

"It's okay, let him die."

Yellow line separates two separate instances of Super-dickery in this week's Countdown. First, when Orion shows up, everyone else wants to help stop Darkseid, who just wiped out half of Metropolis in his battle with Jimmy and is a universal threat that could probably kill Superman one on one, yet Superman tells everyone to just let them fight it out because it's father and son. Let's ignore how Supes butt his nose into all the New Gods stuff in Death of the New Gods already and had no problem helping Orion there. Finally, after he kills Darkseid, Superman tells everyone to let Orion go and to not bother trying to save him and to let him go die in the gutter or some backalley. Who approved this garbage?

INCREDIBLE HERCULES #116

"Beer"

This is roadmap I mentioned in my review of this title. I think me and Hercules would get along just fine. Ba-ba-ba-beer, beer, beer, beer.

"For the Skrulls have already conquered Earth."

Didn't expect this. I knew this title was going to be tying into Secret Invasion, but the whole decapitated Skrull head still caught me by surprise. Hopefully they explain where Athena got it from or I guess that be who she got it from.

IRON MAN #28

"Old school armour for the win!"

I'm going to buck public opinion and state I love the old school Iron Man armours. Maybe it's just how ineffectual the Extremis version is, what with the face guard always being torn off like tissue paper or the fact the Gibbon or White Rabbit could probably beat Iron Man when he's wearing that armour, based on how Iron Man is portrayed in other books. Anyways, I wasn't expecting this armour to be waiting for him in his escape hatch and he kicked all kinds of ass with it later on.

"That's pain. That's Motrin pain."

Note to self - don't have alien rings surgically implanted into spine. Or, at least, wear a shirt so they can't easily be torn out by men in cybernetic battle armour.

"Zrrraaaapppp!"

Yes, that's Tony zapping his own heel off. He's wearing an Extremis power ankle inhibitor that stops him from using his Extremis powers. The Mandarin has launched Extremis air born virus missiles that need to be stopped. The logical solution is to cut your foot off, remove the ankle and use your powers to stop the missile. Doesn't mean it's not going to hurt...

X-FACTOR #30

"My keen deductive mind says that Arcade is behind this."

Less focus on D-list villains, more focus on character moments like this is what X-Factor needs. Still a great book, but treading water post-Messiah Complex.

"Nice hair."

Monet was zapped with a couple thousand volts by one of Arcade's traps and is a little out of it and extremely pissed here. Another one of my favourite moments from this week's issue.

X-MEN: DIVIDED WE STAND BOOK 1 #1

"We were just kids."

It's not often we get to see the side effects to the X-Men lifestyle, but this Anole story was a great example of it. Anole is a teenager and you can see he's really struggling to come to terms with what he's been through, how Cyclops basically kicked everyone out and how it's impossible for him to return to his normal life. There's another scene I forgot to post, but it was of Anole in school and it shows the X-Men barely teach any "normal" schoolwork and he was months behind all his friends.

"I am...home."

A picture perfect example of 'home is where the heart is', as this is clearly not what Nehzno considers to be his home anymore. I went on about this story at great length in my review this week, so I'll just touch on one other thing with this moment. It's kind of sad seeing that New X-Men group shot because I know were never going to get to see the team together like that again.

"Wolverine? Is that you?"

Ugh, this was an absolutely brutal attempt at drawing what I believe is supposed to be Wolverine. While most of the artwork was great in Divided We Stand, I guess a few duds were bound to slip by editorial.

"Oh, and Northstar?"

I called this a punch in the face, but on second look, it's definitely an elbow by Anole. I liked the final panel where Anole tells him to tell everyone to keep away, "even Santo". It showed that, even though Santo antagonizes him all the time, he doesn't hate him and the "even Santo" part tells me he considers him a close enough friend that he had to add that little bit to the end. Good stuff.

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Comic Book Moments of the Week for 04/09/08

It's hockey playoff time. I'm a Canadian. I had to watch it last night and with the size of this week's Moments of the Week, there was no way I could do both. Since this is coming to you on Saturday, you can guess hockey took priority. If it's any consequence, this is a huge list of moments to make up for it. Enjoy!

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #556

"My webshooters don't work under these conditions."

Actually, they don't work at all. If you've been keeping score, and we all have, the webshooters have broke, malfunctioned, jammed or just plain didn't work in every single issue of Brand New Day. He knew there was a blizzard, but because Peter is such a loser this days, he couldn't be bothered whipping up a new batch of webbing, webbing that Ben Reilly made for $30 back in the 90's. Damn $2000 webbing inflation. I hear this new arc is actually pretty good, but I guess there's some kind of moratorum from editorial that the webshooters must break every single issue to show how much hard luck Peter has. After eight or nine issues of it happening, though, it's just getting ridiculous now.

COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #3

"It's well past time for me to put you down."

What? What is Superman, with heat vision red eyes, telling Darkseid it's about time he finally killed him? Don't believe the ridiculous claims by Carlin in interviews passing this off as Superman just overexaggerating and he's just going to knock him out and put him in jail, as if it's even possible to do to Darkseid. This is just bad anyway you look at it.

"WHAP WHAP WHAP WHAP WHAP"

That's the collective sound of every reader banging their heads off the wall after reading this. Let's overlook the over-the-top nature of Mary beating Donna with Kyle, literally. Look at the top two panels. Left leg of Kyle is held. Look at the bottom panels. Right leg of Kyle. QUALITY.

"God save us all."

Darkseid vs. Giant Turtle Boy Jimmy in a Godzilla remake gone bad is what we have to look forward to next week. I probably shouldn't have a right to complain since I keep buying it, but it's like looking at a gruesome car crash now. You want to look away, but you can't help but keep staring.

FANTASTIC FOUR #556

"Kiel?"

Okay, CAP is a big giant robot. I have a normal gun. I'm not firing on the giant robot. EVER. Especially if I live in the Marvel Universe, where I know giant robots of doom are immune to bullets. Still, look at what CAP does to these guys. Disintigration beam of Mars Attacks! level. Now, watch what he does to heroes.

"Skrulls?"

I'm guessing these guys are Skrulls. Hard to imagine half of these guys in the Arctic or on SHIELD's speed dial. Hitch was probably told to just draw "a bunch of heroes" and picked whatever ones he felt like. Half of these guys aren't even registered. Let's not forget that CAP just defeated the Sentry, the most powerful being on the planet, Iron Man, who interface with any electronics and is pretty damn powerful himself, the Vision, who's merged with Kang's 30th century tech and can phase through machinery, and the myriad of other heroes he defeated. Where was this CAP at when the Hulk destroyed New York last year? And why didn't CAP disintigrate the heroes he defeated? He was designed to stop heroes and military. Why didn't he finish them like those humans above? I know the scene was designed to show what a threat CAP is, but this should have been toned down a bit.

"Pym Particles?"

Did CAP just grow? He was 10-15 feet high, maybe, when he towered over the humans in the first moment. Now he's like the freaking Anti-Monitor.

"I'm on my way."

I loved this panel and the brief panel on the previous page with everyone worrying. Reed coming in to save the day all nonchalant-like was my favourite part of the book.

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #23

"SNORR"

Everyone else gets dragged off from something important. Guy's busy sleeping and doesn't even wake up as he's pulled along by the ring. Not sure when the rings started doing the whole "control the Lantern, regardless of what he's doing" thing, but this scene put it to good use.

"What's the sound of one arm clapping."

That's one way to remove a Sinestro Corp's ring from its owner.

"Ion Punk'd!"

First time back in the sattle since the Superman Prime fight and Ion jobs to a freaking flower. Ugh. Don't make god-like characters if you don't want to use them. This is basically how Sentry is treated in the Marvel Universe. Can't have a threat if one guy can take care of it instantly, so take him out of it in a contrived manner at the onset. I'll wait and see how this plays out, but disappointed in his use if this is how he'll be treated.

JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA #14

"A little crowded in here..."

There's a lot of little details that make this simple introduction scene so good. We've got Mr America sitting on a lawn chair, Mr T is on a simple stool and Starman is in the back, lugging in a living room lounge chair and bumping into Superman, causing him to spill his tea. Many would have did a simple head count, slapped the name plates on each of them and called it a day.

"Next: Someone gets beat up. Bad."

There's some debate over whether this is our Alan Scott or the KC version, like the Superman that crossed over. Considering he calls Obsidian his son in the previous page and the fact our Alan went missing after the initial outburst over Gog attacking their (the JSA's) children members, I believe he was busy forming the armour and preparing with his son for this splash page. Whether he absorbed his lantern into his chest like the KC version and is a powerhouse now or if this is just "cool armour" remains open to debate. Alan wasn't wearing the eyepatch this issue. He had the domino mask, similar to this image, at the start, too.

"Ouch?"

On second viewing, this doesn't look as clear cut a kill shot as the first time through. It's hard to tell if it's just in his shoulder or if he's pierced through his chest. Considering the nature of Sandman, he's probably not going to die either way, but still a cool image.

DC NATION

"Manazons..."

I don't want to know what the Manazons are. I just hope it has nothing to do with that Countdown tie-in with the male version of the Amazons or Amazons Attack. I don't think I could handle that much fail. Other noteworthy listings are the Kingdom Come sequel and The Dark Side Club. Not sure what the latter is, but KC had a sequel already. It's called The Kingdom. Hopefully, this new one means a painted version by Ross, maybe with Johns or Waid back on it. The rest are all events we already know about, so not worth mentioning. Any ideas on what The Dark Side Club is?

NOVA #12